


Sweet and Bitter

by TheSkyAtMidnight



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, One-Sided Attraction, Reminiscing, Unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27433123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSkyAtMidnight/pseuds/TheSkyAtMidnight
Summary: Lavender reminisces over her affection towards one Harry Potter
Relationships: Lavender Brown/Harry Potter
Kudos: 9





	Sweet and Bitter

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: I've assumed Lavender survived the war- the book is unclear on this whereas the movie depicts her dead.  
>  _Disclaimer:_ The Harry Potter Universe does not belong to me. Only to JK Rowling.

Lavender sighed as she traced the scars on her shoulder. Recovery had been painful and slow. Parvati and Padma had visited her every day before they'd left to India, but now she was alone.

As she stared out the window, the memories flooded back as if the battle had been yesterday. Harry-he'd always been that to her- had plunged the castle into battle with his return. That foolish, brave boy had then proceeded to defy Snape who'd fled and then rushed off with loony Lovegood.

There was a pang in her chest as she recalled the way Ginny Weasley had looked at him, and the way he'd returned her gaze; And then they'd been fighting, she'd fallen from that blasted balcony…she shivered-she. would. not. think. about. the. attack. now- Granger of all people had saved her, she'd slipped into unconsciousness after, and woken the next morning to learn that Harry Potter had killed You- Know -Who.

That boy…  
She'd first noticed him-actually noticed him in third year. He'd climbed up the ladder to Divination class and amongst the incense smoke his messy, windswept black-hair looked so inviting to run her fingers through. He'd accidentally glanced at her and she'd ducked her head and flushed pink. She'd told Parvie in an excited whisper and received an amused smile in return.

Then when Professor Trelawney predicted his death on seeing a Grim (how had she never heard of this before?), she'd vowed to put special efforts into Divination, maybe she could foretell it and prevent it…  
After that, she'd realised she couldn't keep her eyes off him or her thoughts from circling around him. And Merlin, his eyes-they were a scorching green (she'd remembered reading that description somewhere) and so mesmerizing.

She didn't like him only for his looks-oh no- but also because he was kind and honest and bold and brave and good and loyal and- she could probably go on like this for ages.

She'd silently hoped he might ask her to the ball, accepted Seamus thinking he'd already asked someone- then he'd asked Parvie in front of her and he'd asked Ron for her. Honestly Ron?  
Oh she'd giggled then but she'd been upset inside and seethed a little, later.

As she'd watched him save Weasley and Fleur Delacour's sister from the lake and go through the maze only to return with a dead Cedric Diggory, her fondness and regard for him had only grown though she never revealed it, only hoped that someday it would be returned.  
When Professor Dumbledore had announced that it was You-Know-Who who'd killed Cedric, she'd been terrified and awestruck at the same time. Terrified for Harry-he would be the one facing him down (she didn't doubt him over this, no) and awestruck because he had duelled _him_ and survived.

Fifth year was the year the Ministry refused to accept Harry and Headmaster Dumbledore's statement. She'd believed them. There was a sort of haunted look to Harry's eyes that told her it was the truth. She had to pretend too, she had not wanted to be singled out for detention from that ugly toad of a Ministry bitch, No thank you.

She'd been one of the first at the Hog's Head. She needed to learn how to fight. She had no intention of dying and who cared who taught them – they were learning to defend themselves, that's all mattered.

Once, during a DA meeting when she had been staring dreamily at Harry (who had been going out with Chang of all people) imagining how it would feel to kiss him, she'd caught Ginny Weasley's eye and received a glare so fierce , she knew she would have turned to ashes if looks could cause harm- that's when she'd taken a step-back, observed and heartbreakingly realised her liking (dare she call it love?) would remain unrequited. She'd also grasped that she could never stop loving him. A tiny part of her would always be fond of him-he had been her first crush (love?) after all.

Harry had a very tight-knit group comprising Granger and most of the Weasleys. The Weasley family had practically adopted him -she remembered seeing him in a sweater not unlike the twins'- and if Weaslette's look was anything to go by and of course, the something in his eyes for her - Cho was going to fail too- (she had not suited him at all) – none of the others stood a chance. She'd blinked away the tears, somewhere deep down she'd known this but it still hurt when it slammed into her and shattered her heart.

She'd fumed about Marietta Edgecombe and for once agreed with Granger's punishment (she'd made up her mind not to cross her too much-who knew she could be so vicious)  
The end of the year had been chaos, with the Ministry finally accepting You-Know-Who's return.

She'd seen Harry then; he'd looked so tired and grief-filled (he'd been as good-looking though). Something in her chest had tightened as she'd realised that the weight of the Wizarding world rested on his shoulders and that was…that was pretty terrible and frightening. She'd wished him luck, he needed it-they all did.

Sixth year -Well, that was a mess-

"Lavender" came a voice, startling her from her reverie.

"Yes Dad?" she called back.

"It's the 16th of October dear, surely you haven't forgotten…ah- recalling the Battle again are we?"

"No- not exactly" she sighed.

"Oh Lavie," he smoothed down her hair, "Come now, let's eat."

She gave a small smile as she traced her scar once more. The future was still a bit uncertain -she'd decided to travel a bit before settling down to study and be a Healer. But if there was one thing she knew; it was that she would accept her scars completely before handing anyone her heart again.

  


_"Your first love isn't the first person you give your heart to―it's the first one who breaks it." ―Lang Leav_

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 'Not the Usual girls Challenge' over at HPFC on fanfiction.net  
> Thanks for reading!


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